World's Greatest Husband

I happened to experience my elder brother's wedding last weekend. Masha Allah they were looking fabulous... Nazar na lagey. During the ups and downs of the whole marriage, I got a unique thought, which I'd never got while attending the 51 odd marriages till now. Now I'm beginning to feel there's some locha going on in my mechanism of understanding. Anyways, getting back to the topic.

When a woman marries a man, she leaves her house, her family, her upbringing, even her name, just to fulfil a social obligation known as marriage. She doesn't know what lies ahead of her. Yet, she forsakes all that has, till date, defined her, to take up a new identity, live in a new world, in a new family, with new relationships and a new name, "Mrs. (her name) (her HUSBAND's name) (HUSBAND's surname). She does all this for the sake of a man who has made her acceptable in the society by marrying her.

But, on the flip-side, she has to share this one person with an'other' woman... Her husband's mother ( known as mother-in-law or in India  'saas'). When a woman has done so much for a man, the least a man can do is be just to her?

What does the husband have to do for his wife? Make her comfortable in all situations, Explain her viewpoint in times of conflict, Be just to her during a conflict (read: saas-bahu jhagda), Take her side during arguements and Highlight her stand as the better and ideal. Always keep her happy with gifts and treats. Take her out every day, if not, then every weekend. Give her a free hand when she wants to shop. Not look at the expenses and grudge about how much more has been spent this month. Never listen to what his mother says about her, taking it to be falsified and concocted!

But then, what about the husband's mother? Should he leave the woman who has brought him to this world, nourished him for nine months in her womb, took care of him since birth till she passes away and fought for him with every possible person in this world (sometimes, his father too!) Where is it written that a man should leave his mother (who did all that which I just listed and many more incomprehensible things which no one would ever understand, save a mother) for a woman, whom he has barely known for a quarter or so, of his life? Hah! Talk about cowardice and irony!

But then, what is "World's Greatest Husband'? Is it a myth? Can it ever exist in today's world? I don't think there exists any such person. Then, what's the purpose behind our dialogue? Have I wasted your time? Certainly not.

The "World's Greatest Husband" can be a reality. How can you define "World's Greatest Husband"???


World's Greatest Husband is the man who can create a relationship of trust, harmony and understanding between his mother and his wife.

World's Greatest Husband is the man who makes his wife treat his mother like her own mother, like a friend-philosopher-guide and makes her mother accept his wife, not as a threat, but as her own daughter and her friend.

World's Greatest Husband is the man who knows that, in relationships, one can never be right or wrong, correct or incorrect... There can be only 'compromise'. Even the compromise is, many times, not fair and just. But, he will make sure neither his mother, nor his wife have grudges against each other.

Well then, who is World's Greatest Husband?

If you're a man reading this, it can be you! Not that I'm telling that we live in an ideal world, where we can become all that we desire... But we can try to incorporate all that we can in us, so that we don't betray either.

Cheers!

Vision

Vision is the story of a man who sees the light of  the day when others  around him turn a blind-eye and a deaf-ear to very important issues in life. It's in the first-person narrative, not because I hope to be in the narrator's situation someday (God forbid) but the views shared by him are what I abide to. This story was written for my Creative Writing Assignment. I'd like to thank Avina ma'am for giving me this opportunity so that I could show you my 'vision'.

Here it goes. Hope you enjoy it.

Vision

The cold, dew-laden grass blades brought butterflies to my stomach. I walked in this park every day, but today was different. I felt my way to my regular bench which I always occupied after my morning walk. As I came near it, I touched it with my hand to confirm. Yes. There were some wrappers lying on the bench. I was disgusted with the people who did this. If I could’ve seen them, they would’ve had it from me.

I picked up the wrappers, walked up to the dustbin measuring my steps and threw the wrappers where they belonged. I returned to my throne. I kept my walking stick beside the bench. Just as I was beginning to enjoy the serene morning, someone occupied the bench behind me. It was an elderly couple.

“This park hasn’t changed in the last fifty years.” said the husband.

“The park hasn’t, but its people have changed” replied the wife.

“New people have come. Some old people have left. Some not-so-good people have been refrained from coming here.”

“I miss the Sharma family. They were good company to us. It’s just been two weeks since they went America.”

“And why wouldn’t they? Their son is there. Well educated. Well settled. Earning in dollars. He only called them there. Still the same sanskari boy. Always thinks about his parents first. What else do parents need?”

“Yes. Even I feel Kanhaiya is a very good boy.”

“But we’re doomed for life.”

“What are you trying to say by that?”

“Sharmaji was fortunate to have a son. All we have is a daughter!”

The wife gasped. My heart skipped a beat. What is this man saying?

“Why are you talking like this? That too about your own child? Why?”

“Shruti’s just a girl. In a few days, we’ll get her married. What are we left with?”

“Shruti’s going to remain our daughter forever.”

“But what good will that do? I wish we had a son.”

“Why do you say that? Shruti has been such a good child. She is an IIT graduate. She works in Infosys. She draws one and a half lakh rupees every month. She is in a respectable position. She makes us stay in a posh Worli flat. She has given us a chauffeur-driven car for ourselves. What else does a parent need?”

“What good will that do? The day she gets married, everything is gone. I won’t be able to use all this. It’ll be below my self-respect.”

“Why do you say that? You think a new relation in her life will sever her permanent relations? She will always remain your little Ammo. She will always care for us. She will be a part of our family. How can she go away? I’ve given birth to her from my own womb. I kept her inside my womb for nine months. She also has part of you – your ansh in her. You and I have brought her up to what she is now. How can you distance her, just like that haan?”

The husband took a deep breath. I didn’t like the way he was talking. Nevertheless, I chose to remain quiet and listen.

“My family never wanted a girl. They always wanted a boy. That is why we had to separate when she was born to us.”

“Why do you say that? Boy or girl, it was inevitable. Do you think we would’ve been able to live in that kabootar-khana after Shruti's birth?”

“A boy would’ve made a big difference. Atleast I would’ve been able to hold my head high in front of my family. I was just disgraced by her birth.”

I wanted to kill this man. I felt as though someone drove a sword through my heart. I clutched the hand rest of the bench tight. Something moved in my stomach. Why isn’t his wife retaliating to him?

“Disgraced? You say that my daughter disgraced you? Shruti won the inter-college dance competition at the age of seven. I think that disgraced you. She won the national level swimming championship at the age of sixteen. I think that disgraced you. She scored 99.90 % in her boards and topped India. I think that disgraced you. She got 98.73% in her 12^th standard boards and topped India again. I think that disgraced you. She got 200 marks in her CET exam and 400 in her IIT-JEE exam. I think that disgraced you. She was recruited by the NASA in her third year and was asked to come to USA but she didn’t go as she wanted to be with us. I think that disgraced you. Infosys gave her the top post in their organisation. I think that disgraced you. Today she drives a BMW. I think that disgraces you. But a son would not have disgraced you. See what your elder brother’s son is doing. He failed in his 10^th boards. He bought his way to an MBA. He has ruined your family business. He’s a smoker, drunkard and a druggist. He need no excuse to throw a party. He kills people when he drinks and drives. He’s a serial womaniser. He’s been divorced twice. He’s been to jail for cheating his own company. He almost killed your brother a month ago to inherit what was left of the property, wealth and business.”

The husband fell silent. Yes! I told myself. I felt sorry for the husband, but I felt happier for the wife.

“I ought to say something here. I know I wasn’t a part of the talk, but I want to share something. Your view that daughters are not equal to sons is very wrong, at least in these times. What your wife says is absolutely right. The achievements of Shruti are fantastic. Wish I had another daughter. If so, she would’ve been Shruti. I’m blind. But my daughter is my vision. She’s made all arrangements for my comfort. She loves me a lot. She spends a lot of time with me. In fact, a week ago, when I fell ill, she left her work and came back to India to help me recover. Though I recovered in three days, she stayed till six days and went back last night. You might’ve heard of her. She’s Aamna Shah, the actress who’s starred in many movies. Recently, when she went to receive an award, she took me on stage with her. She’s opened an orphanage in my name. What she has done for me, I don’t think a son would’ve ever done for me.”

I stood up, picked up my stick and started to walk.

“And remember, a son is a son till he gets a wife; but a daughter is a daughter for her whole life. ”

I smiled and started walking. Though I couldn’t see, but I knew that both of them had turned back and were staring at me. I felt the warmth of the rising sun directly on my face, which meant I was facing east. What a view it would’ve made.

As I walked back home, feeling content, I remembered an incident which happened with Prophet Mohammad (S.A.W.S.)

A man asked the Prophet, “What does Allah do when He is happy with us?”

The Prophet replied, “He sends rains.”

The man enquired further, “What happens when He is happier?”

The Prophet replied, “He sends guests.”

The man further enquired, “What happens when Allah is happiest?”

The prophet smiled and replied, “He creates daughters.”

-AliShahbaz Halari

SYBMM-A-22

Exam Time Yaani...

Well, being a BMM student, theory exams don't really don't matter a lot when you can easily get fantastic marks in projects. So, yesterday I watched two movies- I Hate Luv Storys and Jaane Bhi Do Yaaro (again). Well, as I aspire to be a film-maker someday (Insha Allah), I've been advised by my favourite teacher to watch even crappy movies "so that you know what not to make" ;-)

By the way, I watched Karthik Calling Karthik today. It was a decent movie.

Getting back to the purpose of this purpose-less talk. ;-)

Creative Writing being my first paper, I was totally relaxed. So relaxed that everyone around me started sweating.=D

I enjoyed writing the paper. Especially the story. I'll upload the story after exams. I even enjoyed the script-writing question.

The reason why I'm sharing this with you'll is that while writing the story, I feel that i evolved as a writer. I began seeing the world in a new light. It was as life-changing experience.


All right then. Will talk to you'll soon. Have an exam tomorrow (I think so =D)